Jado ([info]jeroenwing) wrote,
@ 2005-04-11 07:21:00
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Current mood: nostalgic
Current music:William Shatner - Has Been

questioningly
Another night, another dream. (of always you?)

Wait, let me start over.

I've been thinking some things over lately. And while I realize that in itself is surprising, that's not all. What's been bothering me lately is that I worry about whether or not my friends realize that I do appreciate them, even if I do sometimes go long...really long amounts of time without talking to them. For some reason it's like, if a certain amount of time passes since I've talked to a friend, I fear that they think I'm a jerk for not staying in touch like a friend should.

[shrugs] I don't know. I suppose my ability to express the fact that I miss someone is totally inadequate. I never intentionally give anyone the cold shoulder, but it probably seems that way. In any case, I want my friends to know that I do appreciate them, and that nothing is taken for granted. Word.

I've got to be heading to work in a few minutes. This morning I'll be working with WonderBoy, who apparently knows everything, has been everywhere in the world, and has all the girls falling for him. Yeah. He's like the coolest guy ever, only that NOBODY REALIZES IT BUT HIM IN HIS MIND. And yet, he seems to be the manager's favorite - go figure.

[tick-tock, you don't stop]




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(Anonymous)
2005-06-08 03:11 pm UTC (link)
"You and I move at the speed of light
One step at a time
We don't have to run"

Do you ever wonder if leaving will mend these feelings that we hold inside? Or will it just become a temporary escape from everything we've tried to run away from and block out? You and I have gone through so much... sometimes too much. I suppose I just wonder if we'll ever be free of the guilt and shame and fear that surfaces when we think we've finally found happiness.

I'm sorry for being the way I have been... you have never deserved my hate, and yet I seem to hand it to you on a golden platter. And yet, sorry is losing its significance. One can only say it so many times before the luster is worn down and the meaning is dull. I always wonder when I'll push too hard and you won't be there with your arms open to catch me again.

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