| the obligatory "i'm still alive lol" post. |
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| 09:14pm 12/03/2007 |
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Hi. I don't really contribute to this much anymore, as one can plainly see. I do update my blog at MySpace (http://www.myspace.com/jeroenwing) from time to time, so if you're interested, there are some sporadic updates over there. I may start posting here once again, though...one never knows.
So. What's been happening? |
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| 01:03am 11/03/2006 |
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mood: detached music: Iron Maiden - Loneliness of the Long Distance Runner
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Since I apparently can't be bothered to update online with any regularity, I thought I'd share some random journal-esque writing I composed at work earlier today. Cast thy gaze upon my catharsis...
7:35pm:
One hour and 25 minutes of unadulterated and unmitigating boredom and forced cheerfulness left to endure. As a last resort by which to retain my sanity, I turn to writing (again?). Predictable, I'm sure...but the same could be said for Scooby Doo, right? And don't a deserve a proverbial Scooby Snack in my own right? ONWARD!
As the various dimensions (light, sound, time, space, etc.) continue to hurtle by, leaving me at a standstill in their wake, it has dawned upon me how relatively unchanged I am. Sure, I've moved out of father's house, became married, and all that jazz, but when it comes down to it...those are just like status changes. Not unlike being toasty in Suikoden or a pygmy in any random Final Fantasy game, I guess you could say (although I don't really have any elixir or tonic to produce a counter-effect - but I digress). The core essence of who I was in, say, eighth grade - that remains. Even if it has been slightly augmented and expanded upon since, I've yet to notice that mythical mutation into a mature adult. Maybe that's a drawback to being incredibly self-aware at a young age. It's probably akin to staring at the minute hand of a clock. When you're watching, it doesn't seem as though it moves. Such is my existence?
I miss it [home] a great deal more than I would have suspected. The predictablity of it all. Feeling like a valued contributor, instead of an easily replaced quantity of hours. A genuine comrade, as opposed to someone to simply kill time with during/after work.
I want it to be known that I didn't willfully abandon anyone. While I'm notoriously good at letting things gradually slide over the edge, it's not as though that's the path I wanted. I only accepted it because I thought that others were fine with it. And I supose the prospect of them actually being alright with it and not thinking of me any longer is the most troubling of all.
ENUFF'ZNUFF TIME 4 A CHANGE |
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| bring this savage back hooooooooooooome |
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| 01:37pm 03/02/2006 |
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music: Iron Maiden - The Mercenary
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So, it's a rare day off from work that isn't a Monday. Color me badd excited!
It seems I tend to leave terse, cryptic entries when I'm extremely pissed off and agitated, and promptly fail to either address any comments of concern or explain myself. It's a perk that goes along with being a bit of a reclusive enigma, I suppose. But, eh, I suppose it can all be summed up in six words: I sell shoes for a living. The occasional fits of bitterness and searing failure make a little more sense now, yes?
If there is one semi-promising development out of the relocation thus far (aside from the fact that I like the apartment and it's generally nice to be living anywhere other than Salem), it's that I actually have a slight (if only ever-so) social life. Which primarily revolves around heading to a certain pub/arcade after work and playing video games in between spells of drinking Newcastle and watching hockey. Oh, and plotting to somehow sabotage the parent company along with my co-workers/comrades.
This evening, I have my last driving lesson. Yes, that means I will soon acquire my driver's license. It's like...and end of an era. The book of J - Eternal Passenger/Pedestrian is coming to a close. Which is why I fully intend to spend the rest of the day listening to Iron Maiden and playing Championship Manager 01/02. What can I say? I like to celebrate in style.
I'm out. Later (probably much later, given my history). |
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| 11:09pm 24/11/2005 |
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mood: holiday cheer music: Sharks vs. Canucks
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The streak of Thanksgivings that have been entirely less than pleasant extends to three. Also, I have to be at work at 7:45am tomorrow, and I won't be getting off until 6:00pm. Feel the joy radiating out of each and every fiber of my being!
Anyway. Back to hockey. |
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| OMG A PLOY FOR INTERACTION WITH FRIENDS! |
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| 11:43pm 21/11/2005 |
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[stolen from ![[info]](http://l-stat.livejournal.com/img/userinfo.gif) webmaster04 aka MY WIFE]
List seven songs you are into right now. No matter what the genre, whether they have words, or even if they're any good, but they must be songs you're really enjoying now. Post these instructions in your Livejournal along with your seven songs. Then tag seven other people to see what they're listening to.
1. Megadeth - Angry Again
2. Dio - Holy Diver
3. New Order - This Time of Night
4. Franz Ferdinand - Michael
5. Black Sabbath - Electric Funeral
6. David Bowie - Life on Mars?
7. Wham! - Last Christmas
TAG, YOU'RE IT MOFO: pixelated_penis, cal, apollo_joe, straponstraton, disintegration, casey, zhaytee |
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| 11:22pm 21/11/2005 |
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answer me era |
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| BLOOD OF HEROES |
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| 11:12pm 21/11/2005 |
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mood: arid music: Dio - Holy Diver
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Like a phoenix rising from the ashes, like a new dawn breaking, like a lame cliché used to begin a paragraph...I RETURN. Please, hold your applause until after the entry is completed.
Since I'm about as reliable as Walt Flanagan's dog when it comes to detailing major events in any length, here's a quick rundown of the major particulars that have transpired in my conspicuous absence:
- Mallory and I tied the knot. And then after we untied it, we got married.
- We then moved to the mysterious world of Omaha, Nebraska.
- I now sell mens' shoes at Dillard's at the Oak View Mall in Omaha. For about 45 hours a week, on average. And the parallels to Al Bundy increase each and every day, let me tell you.
Eddie Guerrero's sudden death was indeed a shock, and I share my brother's lamenting of the situation.
I saw Paul McCartney perform live a couple of weeks ago. 'Twas quite rocking. Verily, it was. Why am I speaking like a medieval knight about this? I do not know.
Anyway, I've decided that the mass frustration and desire to destroy everything caused by the various annoying customers I encounter on a daily basis would probably be eased somewhat if I were to let the various nonsensical rants and diatribes boiling around in my head out from time to time. Hence, the return to the journal. It seems like it was so long ago that I actually used this as a means of expressing myself on a regular basis. But, uh, yeah. Expect future incoherence on a variety of topics in the near future.
To my HOMEBOYS IN THE HOOD (that's my urban slang I picked up from the MEAN STREETS OF OMAHA), I apologize for being incommunicado for so long. See the above bit about working 45 hours a week on average. And this feels kind of lame, not unlike what's sure to be the next Eminem track once he gets through with rehab, but....yeah, I'm back. RECOGNIZE~
So, what's been happening? |
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| questioningly |
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| 07:21am 11/04/2005 |
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mood:  nostalgic music: William Shatner - Has Been
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Another night, another dream. (of always you?)
Wait, let me start over.
I've been thinking some things over lately. And while I realize that in itself is surprising, that's not all. What's been bothering me lately is that I worry about whether or not my friends realize that I do appreciate them, even if I do sometimes go long...really long amounts of time without talking to them. For some reason it's like, if a certain amount of time passes since I've talked to a friend, I fear that they think I'm a jerk for not staying in touch like a friend should.
[shrugs] I don't know. I suppose my ability to express the fact that I miss someone is totally inadequate. I never intentionally give anyone the cold shoulder, but it probably seems that way. In any case, I want my friends to know that I do appreciate them, and that nothing is taken for granted. Word.
I've got to be heading to work in a few minutes. This morning I'll be working with WonderBoy, who apparently knows everything, has been everywhere in the world, and has all the girls falling for him. Yeah. He's like the coolest guy ever, only that NOBODY REALIZES IT BUT HIM IN HIS MIND. And yet, he seems to be the manager's favorite - go figure.
[tick-tock, you don't stop] |
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| ...I want you to be you |
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| 05:55pm 06/04/2005 |
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mood: revived music: Killers - Somebody Told Me
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Yeah, I continue to exist. Let's get this party started.
Semi-interesting developments since the last update:
- Not going to college this semester, due to a wonderful twist of fate that prevented my financial aid from being processed until after the deadline for registration had passed.
- Despite being in academic purgatory yet again, I made the Dean's List at IUS.
- I'm now employed at an extremely-glamorous five-star restaurant, also known as SUBWAY. Eat fresh, yo.
- My aunt died last Saturday. I miss her.
- On a brighter note, the wedding is only 24 days away.
I've skipped over some random drama and boring events, but that's pretty much it. Now, onto current affairs - I'm scheduled for 53.5 hours of work this week. Overtime city. It'll be worth it when the paycheck comes in, though.
The "Don't Stop Me Now" scene in Shaun of the Dead is pretty much my favorite moment in all of motion picture history. Also, I've determined that I will someday own a Liger as a pet.
And...I'm quickly becoming bored, so that's all for the time being. I'll try to update more often than every few months from now on. Word up.
( Still Alive ) |
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| it is also a joy month |
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| 12:16am 14/12/2004 |
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mood: that's what it is all about music: Wesley Willis - Merry Christmas
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Ah, so that's where I put my journal. I thought that perhaps I'd misplaced it for good. (WHAT A RELIEF)
It's been quite awhile since my last update. As one may have guessed, preoccupation with school essentially killed off the free time that would have otherwise been spent filling this page with relatively aimless ramblings. Since I'm lazy, I'll sum up some of the most eventful happenings of the interim with brief sentence fragments highlights.
- Moved in with Mallory
- Resigned from Papa John's
- Should be working for Kohl's soon, if not the hospital
- Managed a 3.7 GPA in my first semester at IUS
- Somehow accomplished this despite completing nearly all my assignments about an hour before class
- Still have yet to sort out my financial aid situation
- Acquired the "Ultimate Edition" DVD of Master of the Flying Guillotine
- Set a wedding date (April 30, 2005)
There, I'm more or less caught up. Life has been going fairly well, for the most part. Malloween is by far the most awesome human being of the 20th century, easily. I'm somehow tired, despite having only been awake since 11am or so. Result - bedtime.
Somewhat more verbose entries to come soon, as inspiration strikes. Word up. |
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| 02:17pm 24/08/2004 |
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mood:  anxious
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So, here I am - college (finally). Took me long enough, I suppose...but I made it nonetheless. I've only had one class as of this writing, but surprisingly enough, I feel as though I've never really stopped going to school. Given the four year lapse between my last period of education, that's probably weird, but eh.
( Class Schedule for Fall 2004 )
I'm going to kill some time by playing Peasant Quest before my Intro to Ethics class. Keep it real like Eazy-E*, yo.
*Minus the whole dealing drugs and dying of AIDS at a young age, of course. |
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| 03:34am 03/08/2004 |
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mood: alive (just) music: Petey Pablo - Freek-A-Leek
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That...was close.
Given tonight's near-death experience, I thought I should actually get around to updating my journal for like, the first time in eons. Everyone can now stop holding their breath.
Um, whoa. I'm not even sure where to begin, so I'll just go with the most important event to transpire over the last few weeks: I'm engaged. Yes, you read that right...engaged, to the greatest ever, Malloween. Happiness doesn't even come close to describing how I feel. Euphoric is close, but still somehow insufficient. Let me put it this way - my heart feels as though it's currently hovering somewhere in the stratosphere, floating above all. Word up.
I would go into further detail, but the desire to pass out is kind of a higher priority at this point. Keep it real. |
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| getting away with it |
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| 03:29am 14/07/2004 |
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mood: however I look, it's plain to see music: Electronic - Getting Away With It
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Salutations. I realize that I have been remiss with my lack of updates over the last month, so I will now attempt to remedy that quandary. ROLL OUT~
Much has happened over recent weeks. Realizing just how deeply I am in love with a certain someone has sort of enhanced the whole living process, I've found. I mean, I already knew I felt this way, but now it's as though it has reached a new level. Sure, there's uncertainty and all, but that's what makes life interesting. I'm not totally sure how to go about dealing with the newfound euphoria, I'm simply taking it all in and enjoying it.
...and it's strange how I'm totally unable to find the words to adequately express this wave of emotion in which I allow myself to wipe out completely. It's like, ask me to ramble on about Doctor Who or Franz Kafka, and I can take forever. But with this...it's difficult to find words worthy of being used to describe how truly wonderful it all is. You know?
In case I haven't mentioned it before, Franz Ferdinand is my new favorite band of the month. Yeah, I know. But still - who knew one would be able to produce such quality music after having been assassinated in Sarajevo 90 years ago? Now that's what I call a comeback!
Je t'adore, mon ange. Beaucoup d'amour, comme toujours. |
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| 04:56pm 18/06/2004 |
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music: Hoobastank - The Reason
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I haven't updated in awhile, so I'll sum up the events of the last week or so with the following.
Life is awesome, then it isn't. Rinse, repeat, rinse.
At the moment, it isn't. But hey, at least now I'll have more time to be online and hang around with my crew. Word up.
Heh. When I stopped in at work to pick up my paycheck this afternoon, Mike seemed surprised that I was wearing "sporty" Nike gear. He also mentioned that I should shave my head - both of these sudden observations coming from nowhere. I found that odd, and I realize it was probably incredibly uninteresting to everyone else. Still, this is my journal, and I'm not being paid to entertain people. There's always the option to remove me from your friends list, you know. o_O
I want a shower CD player. Like, NOW. I seriously need to stop wasting money. |
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| paragraphs are for the awake |
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| 06:30pm 06/06/2004 |
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music: Fabolous - Young'n (Holla Back)
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I'm too exhausted to write up a proper update, so enjoy this - you know you love it.
I'm ready to sleep the sleep of champs.
You Got Served is the most unintentionally hilarious movie EVER.
Harry Potter and the Prisoner of Azkaban was nifty.
Mals' niece (or should I say daughter?) is a cute kid.
Tullis really blows at video games - like, I totally want to yank the controller out of his hand 90% of the time.
I had an alright time, I guess.
I'm passing out now.
Holla. |
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| 03:24am 04/06/2004 |
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mood: replyhazy, try again music: Cameo - Word Up
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WORD UP
WORD UP
I SAID WORD UP, DAMN IT.
I feel much better now. About everything. I don't know how, but I do - I won't question it. I'm not going into details, so if you're looking for an in-depth report, you're out of luck. Actually, just consider yourself lucky you haven't been in the mix; the J-Bird effect has not been one to behold as of late. It'll be better, though, because I'm going to stop giving a damn. That's the key, I think.
I'm going to sleep all day, work, and then return home to sleep some more. My Friday night will rule like no other, FOR REAL. |
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| Spearmint? I'd rather have Wintergreen. What are you talking about? |
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| 07:03am 02/06/2004 |
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music: The Wallflowers - One Headlight
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Not only are Chuck and myself an awesome screenwriting team, but we are probably also the best tag team video gaming duo of all time. The two of us ended up playing Mega Man 2 for about five consecutive hours, and in the process had such a good time that it almost didn't even matter that Tullis decided to no-show the movie planning session. Alas, he left his White Stripes CD at my house - wait, that just means I get to listen to it that much longer! Rock. \m/
It's looking as though the schizophrenic/bipolar weather patterns are on track to continue - today's looking to be nice outside, thus far. If it ends up raining tomorrow, I will officially diagnose the weather with manic depression and prescribe it some sort of medication.
Heh. I'm not sure why, but I always feel like I should pitch in a bit with some work off the clock when I visit Mallory and Tullis at Papa John's. For real, it was all I could do to keep myself from sanitizing my hands and joining in on the make line when a screen of orders appeared while Chuck and I played hacky sack with a piece of dough. What can I say? I'm one hell of a guy (riiiiiiiight). o_O
Awesome, I'm supposed to do some work for my father in about four hours, and I haven't even gone to bed yet. I totally have the best time-management skills ever. WORD LIFE |
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| ICE COLD |
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| 08:36am 26/05/2004 |
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mood: ruling it music: Cake - The Distance/Van Halen - Runnin' With The Devil (J-Bird Master Mix, in my head)
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I feel so freaking OUTSTANDING right now. I ran for about two miles in the rain, to get all of this negativity/stress/other bullshit out - it worked like a charm, you don't even know how well. Everything makes sense now. I'm not even tired, I could run like another three and a half miles right this second if I felt like it. Four words perfectly express how I feel right now.
DOUBLE
THE FUCK
DRAGON!
Yeah! Oh, and you've got to check out my stupid Hotmail horoscope, it's funnier than an old man falling down and racking himself with his cane.
"LEO
Wednesday, May 26, 2004
A partner or close companion has a sudden flash of inspiration and could call you with a great idea or wild notion at any time today. You might feel like a stick in the mud if you are not as enthusiastic, but you could also be the voice of reason."
Yeah, I've only been calling myself the voice of reason for like, a few years now. This like one of those fortune cookies that doesn't even really tell a fortune, but instead a simple observation. "You have a quietly intelligent nature." What? That's supposed to be a fortune? Like hell it is, that's something that should be obvious to everyone. Almost makes me wish that we'd skipped out on paying for dinner last night.
Right now I'm listening to both "Going the Distance" by Cake and "Runnin' With The Devil" by Van Halen...at the SAME TIME. I'm going to make the jivest dance remix of the two songs combined, it will rule so hardcore it isn't even funny. Then I can quit Papa John's and tour with Robert Miles and ultimately end up addicted to heroin and featured on "Behind the Music". I can't WAIT.
There's so much I realized while I was running that my short-term memory is having difficulty keeping up with it all. There's a quote from Haggard that sums things up nicely. And yeah, I'm probably going to keep talking about how cool that movie is until everyone either
a) sees it and loves it
b) sees it and hates it
c) takes me off of their friends list/stops talking to me in real life because they're too stupid to deal with what's what.
But anyway! Here's the quote, from the incomparable Falcone (Brandon DiCamillo):
"You think I'm kidding, watch how kidding I am."
Haggard also features the Doctor Who theme song playing in the background at one point. There's also a cover of "Livin' La Vida Loca" that features kazoos. KAZOOS! Is that not enough to make you want to watch it every day for the rest of your life? No? Then I don't even know you anymore!
I just made a new icon, showing how killer I think everything is now that I know what's up! \m/ CAROLINE~ |
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| it was like water down the drain |
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| 04:56am 26/05/2004 |
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mood: l'etranger music: Bernard Butler - Not Alone (irony?)
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Stoneco864 (2:38:20 AM): your in a band just like Zack attack
Zheroen (2:38:34 AM): I'm more like Sly from California Dreams
True that, true that. Though I do have this awesome silk shirt that's totally like something Screech Powers would wear. I think I've worn it in public all of once. It rules.
Only like, my favorite song EVER (for now, anyway)
I totally just wrote a poem right now, which is exceedingly rare. When inspiration hits, I've just got to use it. You know how it is.
je sais que tu regrettes nous, maintenant.
je suis désolé, vraiment.
mon rêveur, je ne peux pas te voir.
bonsoir, au revoir.
Stupid, isn't it? Apologies for it being in French. I couldn't express the feelings in English, as dumb as that may sound. Anyway...what? YEAH! OKAY!
I'm going to leave like Meursault, now. Later, I guess(?). |
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| shot right through |
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| 10:36pm 23/05/2004 |
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mood: idiot music: Jerry Cantrell - My Song
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As of last night, I've successfully managed to alienate everyone I truly care about (most importantly, the one person I never wanted to hurt, ever). It's quite an accomplishment, really - absolutely nothing to be proud of, mind you, but still incredible. How do I manage such feats of stupidity? It is a mystery, for sure.
I should flee to Tibet and become a monk or something, before I create any further havoc. I swear, I'm the goddamned living embodiment of entropy itself. |
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